Optimus Before Prime
by tinyrobotlover
Summary: TFP- Optimus sometimes longs for the days before the war. The days when he was not Prime, but a simple clerk with a simple life. But that is not so. However, three humans hope to help him remember the days from long ago.


**This is my first time writing for an Autobot. I have to say... That was weird. **

**I actually wrote the majority of this while sitting beside my grandmother at a nursing home right down the road from my house. She was in the process of dying and I would talk and read to her while she was semi-awake and writing while she napped. She went on to Heaven on January eighth and I am so thankful for those precious last moments I got to spend with her.**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy this oneshot and have a blessed day!**

* * *

Optimus sighed heavily. In all honesty, there were some days he almost wished the Decepticons would start something just so he could get a break from the stresses of having downtime. He respected his fellow Autobots, of course. He was completely devoted not only to their cause, but to each individual soldier on his team. They had been through so much together. How could he not see them as more than just cogs in a machine?

Still, on days like this he longed for the days before he was Prime. The days he could simply go for a drive without having the weight of the world resting on his shoulders.

"Optimus?"

The Prime was pulled from his thoughts. He looked down and met the gaze of a somewhat worried human.

"Are you okay?" The boy pushed his glasses further up on his face.

Optimus watched him carefully. He had been cautious not to allow his discontentment to show, hadn't he? Why would the child be concerned for him? He tilted his helm slightly. "Why do you ask?"

"You've been quiet. Well, more quiet than usual."

The Prime was silent. Lost in his thoughts.

The humans were much more observant than he had previously given them credit for. Even his own Autobots hadn't noticed his mood's downward spiral.

If they had, they didn't say anything.

What was bothering him, really? Was it the war? This battle had gone on for far too long. He was tired of it, but who wasn't?

Was it the Autobots? They could be boisterous and stubborn and hard to command at times, but that was what he truly admired about them. They were determined. They were loyal to their cause. He respected that.

Was it the humans that bothered him? Certainly not! Optimus saw value in all life. He had seen a myriad of life forms in their battles across the cosmos, but none held his affections like the humans did. They were magnificent creatures! Physically, they were weak—at least by comparison with Cybertronians—but their loyalty and love toward each other rivaled that of even the collective wisdom of the Primes. They would gladly sacrifice themselves for their Cybertronian friends. They placed themselves in a war they had no reason to be involved in simply because they considered the Autobots an extension of their family.

Family.

That was another reason to admire the humans. Optimus had heard the term before. He had even used it when referring to the closeness of certain groups within the Autobot army, but he had never truly understood what family was until he met the children.

Family. The Autobots were his family. The children were his family. So why was he still feeling so alone?

"Optimus?"

The Prime shuttered his optics quickly. How long had he been standing there? Did the boy think he had brushed his feelings to the side? Did he seem uncaring toward the child's concern for him? Optimus opened his mouth to reply, but was quickly cut off by the human.

"Optimus, um… Do you…"

The Prime waited. Tilting his helm in curiosity.

"Well," Raf adjusted his glasses again. "It's just that you've been cooped up in the hangar for a while now and you just seem kind of…"

Distant? Unfeeling? Cold? Detached?

"Lonely."

Optimus frowned, averting his gaze. He felt ashamed that he had not better hidden his emotions.

"Well, Miko, Jack and I were talking and… Since the Decepticons have been quiet we thought that maybe you might want to go somewhere… With us."

"I was not aware that the Autobots were planning to take you three on an outing."

"Not the Autobots," said Jack as he climbed the stairs to meet Raf on the landing. Miko followed closely behind. "Just us, Optimus."

"Yeah, we never get any one-on-one time with you, big guy," Miko added with a smile.

The Prime was silent. Unsure of how to respond.

He knew the humans cared for him, but their wanting to spend time with him had never crossed his processor. He was far from exciting.

Admittedly, he could be quite dull.

"We already ran it by Agent Fowler and Ratchet," Jack said, breaking the silence. "They promise to call if anything happens, no matter how big or small, so no worries there."

Miko bounced excitedly. "I wanted to take you to a concert, but Fowler said you seemed like more of a lazy afternoon kind of guy. Then Raf thought we could go to the beach, but Ratchet said all the sand would get in your joints and itch for weeks, so Jack said he and his mom used to go to this lake when he was a kid and we all decided that would be a good place to go."

Raf smiled brightly. "I found a lake with thick forests all around and not many tourists this time of year. It looks pretty safe."

"If we leave now," Jack interjected, "we could still beat the sunset."

Optimus was taken aback. He wanted to respond, but could not form the words to do so.

"I…"

"Go, Optimus," Ratchet said, entering the room and activating the groundbridge. "Coordinates are set and we can get along without you for a few hours."

The Prime blinked. He looked from the Medic to the bridge, to the children and back to Ratchet.

He transformed and opened his doors.

* * *

A cool breeze blew up from the lake at the bottom of the hill causing the trees to sway in their lazy, autumn dance. The sky was pale blue with hints of pink beginning to peek out from behind an orange sun that slowly dipped to meet the glassy water below.

There were no sounds of cars or machinery. No humans chattering on their cell phones. Only birds singing to each other as squirrels and deer pranced about the leafy ground in search of something to eat. Even the gentle creaking of bark could be heard in the blissful silence.

This was a world at peace.

Optimus smiled.

"Miko, that's not how you light a fire."

Optimus glanced down at the children at his feet. They had found a small clearing incased my thick foliage on the hillside, overlooking the water, and were attempting to build a fire. The Prime had offered return home with the weather being cooler than they had anticipated, but they refused. He then offered to let them sit in his cab where they could watch the sun set at a comfortable temperature, but they refused. Finally, he asked if he could help them with their fire, but they told him to just enjoy himself and not worry about them.

After some kind and gentle debating on his part, it was settled that he would not try to interfere with their fire building so long as they asked for help should they see that they were having too much difficulty.

"You put two pieces of wood together and rub. Everyone knows that, Jack," snapped the Asian girl, shoving the boy out of her way.

"Just because people do it like that on movies, doesn't mean it works that way in real life."

"How much wood do you think we'll need?" Raf asked, carrying a pile of fallen branches he had been gathering since they got there. His foot got caught on a root and he stumbled, flailing his arms and giving a quick yelp. But instead of receiving a face full of dirt, his forward motion was cut short by a cool, metal hand.

Optimus set the boy on his feet, allowing a small chuckle to escape his throat.

The children froze and slowly turned to look at him.

"Did you just laugh?" Miko asked in awe.

The Prime's optics seemed to twinkle as a delighted smile settled onto his face. "That surprises you."

It wasn't a question. He knew he wasn't the cheeriest of life forms. He accepted that. He was Prime, after all.

"It's just," Jack started, "we've never heard you laugh before."

"Ever," Miko added.

Optimus pointed toward the pile of wood on the ground. "Is it my turn?"

The children surrendered.

Transforming his arm into a canon he held a small log at the end of the barrel. He charged his weapon and waited for the heat from the plasma charge to ignite the wood. It took less than thirty seconds. He then brushed fallen leaves and twigs away from a section of the forest floor until only soil was seen. He placed the burning log in the center of the soil and laid a few smaller branches against it, careful not to smother the flame.

Once satisfied with his work, he sat back and smiled at the children's gawking faces.

"Dude!" Miko yelled, throwing her arms up in exasperation. "Why didn't we just let him do it from the beginning?"

* * *

Optimus had settled himself against a rather sturdy Oak with his left leg tucked under him and his right pulled to his chest. He rested his arm over his knee and leaned his helm back against the tree's trunk. Optics closed. Listening contently to the children talk about anything and everything that popped into their vibrant, young minds.

Suddenly they were silent.

He onlined his optics and was pleasantly surprised by what he saw.

They watched in wonder as the Doe led her fawn right through their gathering without so much as a glance their way. There was no fear in her. It was a beautiful thing to behold.

For a moment, in this world of peace and trust, he forgot that he was in a war.

The Deer disappeared into the darkness with her young and Optimus turned his attention to the gap in the trees that allowed him to look down to the lake at the hill's base. It was shimmering, black ink that danced with the wind under the light of a bright moon. The sky was cloudless; giving full view to the trillions of stars that gladly offered their wondrous sense of peace and belonging to the burdened travelers who dared look upon them.

The treetops continued to sway to their silent song, their branches reaching upward to the heavens in an effort to join with the stars while never daring to leave the hidden worlds they protected on the forest floor.

"Optimus?"

The Prime turned his attention back to the children gathered around the fire. He wondered if they were ready to return to base. How long had they been gone?

"What made you laugh earlier?" Raf asked curiously.

Optimus felt another chuckle well within him, but did not let it escape. "A memory," he said simply.

Miko crossed her arms. "Details, big guy."

Optimus' smile, which had yet to budge from its home on his face, widened gradually.

"When we first came to earth, Ratchet, Bumblebee and I were scouting a forest not unlike this one. We were not accustomed to traversing uneven and soft ground. Your soil and rough terrain proved quite the challenge at first." His smile held the slightest hint of a smirk. He wondered if the children noticed.

"We had picked up an energon signature in the vicinity and were desperate to get to it as soon as possible, being that our efforts to get here had greatly depleted our own reserves.

"There was a group of college students who had decided to go on a camping trip that night. We had seen very little of human kind at that point, choosing to remain hidden in the event we were followed by the Decepticons, and were caught off guard when we noticed the glow of the students' fire behind us." He poked at the ashen wood, stirring the flame to keep the humans warm. "Ratchet thought we were under attack and moved to shield Bumblebee. When he did, he lost his footing and fell into an old tree, uprooting in and knocking it over onto the humans' tent."

The children laughed at Optimus' story, picturing the entire scene in their minds. It was hard to imagine Ratchet being so careless and face-planting a tree his first day on earth.

"Thankfully, none of the humans were in their tent. They ran before we had the chance to examine them for injuries. Ratchet tried to apologize, but was distracted by the fire. He could not seem to grasp the concept of organic matter burning so easily when everything on Cybertron had to be fed gasses and specific grades of energon. It took Bumblebee and myself quite some time to coax him away."

Optimus watched as the children rolled in their laughter, tears streaming down their cheeks.

He placed another log in the fire.

Jack sat up first, wiping his face and trying desperately to catch his breath. "Okay, okay," he said after a few more seconds of panting. "So, there's a story that's blackmail worthy."

Optimus' optics brightened at him. "Indeed."

"No way!" Miko shot to her feet and pointed an accusing finger at him. "You? Blackmail?"

The Prime only smiled.

She sniggered and sat back down by the fire. "So, what was life like back before the war, Optimus?"

"Yeah. Ratchet told us you were a clerk and pretty quiet back then."

"He said you were a lot like Jack," Raf added.

Optimus considered that. "I suppose so."

Miko tilted her head. "So, if you could describe yourself as Orion Pax in one word, what would it be? Quiet? Thoughtful? Boring?"

"Sarcastic."

The kids stared.

"Not aloud, but in my thoughts," he explained. "As a clerk, I was to be quiet, focused and organized, but I must admit, I had something to say about every situation I encountered in those days."

"I can't imagine that," Jack said, shaking his head.

Optimus smiled at him. "There were only a few I shared my opinions with. We did not typically mix social standings in the caste system, but I befriended a few in the guard who came to me for stored data files often. Those who I became close to, I spoke more freely with." His smile faded. "Though Megatron was the first I ever trusted enough to speak bluntly with."

Silence fell over the group for several minutes as it was clear Optimus had become lost in his memories.

Finally, Raf broke the quiet with a question. "What was Megatron like back before the war?"

The Prime's optics flickered. His voice was quiet. Distant. "He was my best friend."

"Seriously?"

Optimus glanced back at the girl. Thought a moment. "No. He was Orion Pax's friend."

She looked confused. "But… You are Orion Pax."

"Not anymore," answered the Prime and he pushed himself up. "It is late. We should return." He buried the fire under the weight of his pede, extinguishing it.

The children looked to each other in confusion.

"Optimus," Jack voiced timidly. "Titles don't really matter. You're the same bot on the inside as you were before. You are still Orion Pax. Back when you lost your memory, that proved that you're still the same guy."

Optimus looked to the stars and sighed sorrowfully. "No, Jack. It proves that Orion Pax could not defeat Megatron. Only Optimus can fight, defend and protect." He transformed and opened his doors. "I can never be Orion if I am to lead the Autobots through this war."

The children climbed back into his cab, each deep in their own thoughts. Optimus' engine revved and a warm air blew from his dash, making them realize just how cold they had actually gotten.

The Prime did not call for a bridge for several more minutes. Truthfully, he did not want to leave. The past few hours had been the closest he had come to feeling free from the bondage of conflict since the matrix of leadership had been bestowed upon him.

But the Autobots needed him.

"Ratchet, open the ground bridge. We are ready to return."

A swirling light appeared before him. He began driving through it.

"Optimus?"

"Yes, Rafael?"

"I know you have to be a Prime with the Autobots and everything and you don't think you can ever be Orion Pax again, but if you ever want to be him... Well… We can always go back to the lake. Just the four of us."

The Prime felt his spark swell at the kind words offered him. Humans truly were amazing.

The light disappeared and the company found themselves back inside Hanger E. Optimus transformed after letting his passengers out and watched them carefully.

The Autobots were approaching. They were asking how the trip was, but Optimus' attention was fixed on the three sets of eyes staring back at him in anticipation.

"I will consider it," he said plainly and left to return to his work.

* * *

**And now Kailey goes back to diverting a fraction of her focus to writing. Specifically writing for A New Beginning.**

**Reviews appreciated! **


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